Waterford: Ireland’s Wine Mecca?

Where is the booziest place in the world?  Yeah, yeah, yeah.  But where in Ireland?  I’m not certain, but after talking with Eamon McEneany, during the Waterford Harvest Festival, I had basis for a fine conclusion.

“Waterford was the wine capital of Ireland all through the middle ages,” boasted McEneany, Director of the Waterford Treasures, “and wine has been imported into Ireland since the 1430s.”  According to a Norman chronicler ‘you would scarcely think that the wine was not cultivated here as it is so plentiful.’

“Only 5 ports in Ireland had licence to import wine,” explained McEneany, “Waterford city council had the distinction of being the only city council in Ireland with the authority to take one of the barrels for themselves (Ed - The tax on wine was two barrels… one barrel from before the mast and one barrel from behind).    So the mayors of Waterford were always drunk.”

Wine & War
Edward I (the bad guy in Braveheart ) used Waterford as a way of taxing goods to pay for his war against the Scots.  Great administrator.  From Waterford he received wheat, barley, fish, meat and wine.  In about 1302, in Skinburness, his troops were in mutiny over the quality of the rations of red wine.

Furious at the failings of his ineffectual son, Edward I ordered an inquiry.  It turns out that white wine (unfashionable) had been dyed red with blackberries and fruit juice by the merchants in Waterford.  A right bunch of chancers, and no mistake.

Scam Artists
Only a few years later, in 1372, they tried to pull another one, this time with greater success.  Waterford had been feuding with New Ross over control of the wine trade for generations.  In order to rally final victory during an inquiry of King Edward III, they presented their charter outlining precedent for control.  What Edward didn’t know, as records had been muddied, was that Waterford actually didn’t have a charter, not a legal one.  They had it sketched up, got in some art, stuck in a few dates and crossed their fingers.  Unfortunately Edward III got sick and died before there was a chance to have it recognised, so the greedy thinkers went back to their dens.

A few years later they presented a new charter, this apparently from John’s reign.  Knowing the English wouldn't be able to verify it, they added in lies about New Ross, and sniggered as they popped it in the letterbox.  Suffice to say, it worked.  New Ross, more or less, lost their trading rights.

Wine Pirates & the Trojan Piss-Up
At that time wine started coming from Spain, so it was time for the O'Driscoll pirates to get involved.  In 1413, three ships from Waterford had been captured and were being held at Baltimore.  The sneaky Waterford mayor, Simon Wickham, told the O’Driscolls he was ‘coming to dance and make merry’ with them at Christmas.  They thought he was coming to pay the black rent, so their guard was down.  He brought stupid amounts of booze, everyone got tanked, and in the morning - during a shoddy hangover, I imagine - the O’Driscolls found themselves captured in their own castle.  Oops.

Whether or not Waterford is the boozy Mecca, I don’t know, but it certainly has a grand collection of crafty winos in its rack.  Thankfully, such a marriage of sly politics and drunkenness wouldn’t again be seen in Irish politics...